The unspecific ‘lump’ of sin and God’s promise of peace and liberation

Over the past few weeks I have been praying repeatedly (within the nooks and crannies of my every-day experience) a deliberately simple, but heart-felt, prayer: ‘Lord, please cleanse me from my sin’. Following the advice given by an anonymous medieval author of the wonderful little book The Cloud of Unknowing, in this prayer I have not complicated matters by trying to identify specific examples of my sin, reflected in my behaviour; but rather I have seen my sin as an unspecific ‘lump’ within me, or as the self-serving ‘I’ at the centre of my sIn.  Briefly, this ‘lump’ is the cause of all what I do (in whatever context) to elevate myself, to assert myself over others, with my personal ambition, pride and vanity. So, in other words, it is all what stops me loving and glorifying God, and serving and loving others.

However, when I pray this prayer I do not feel oppressed or depressed about who I am, as I know that when I come to God like this he promises and delivers me peace and liberation. He not only forgives me, through the sacrifice of his son Jesus Christ who takes the blame for my sin (and see 2 Corinthians 5:21), but he also takes the pressure off, as I no longer need to strive to succeed in my assertion of myself, and feel anxious at the possibility of failure. All I need to do instead is to wait and receive from him his grace and his power, and his blessing, as I have myself turned inside-out – giving my sin for him to deal with, with him replacing my self-centredness with his love and his self!

As David asks God in Psalm 51:10 ‘Create in me a new heart, and renew a steadfast spirit within me’, so I too ask God for a new heart and a right attitude. This request echoes again the promise of salvation in Christ, as I do not have to make my heart right and work hard for my salvation (this task, indeed, would make me deeply oppressed and depressed). Instead, all I need to do is turn to him with an attitude of humility, admitting that I need cleansing, then wait for his intervention.    

For details of my book, Nine Steps to Well-Being: A Spiritual Guide for Disconnected Christians and Other Questioning Journeyers go to my blog’s home page http://disconnectedchristians.blogspot.co.uk/ or to the publishers website ‘Whispering Tree Original Books’ where the first three chapters can be accessed FREE! http://www.whisperingtreeoriginalbooks.com/?page_id=40